Good is not enough

This week was a crappy one. Well shit and craps happen sometimes.

I have no idea what or how to start off, but it seems like lately things have been larger than life, and I am sort of lost. It may not make any sense to you. To me either, but it’s something very abstract and can’t merely put into words.

Sometimes I complained about college life being so blend. The same old routine of going to college, study, hang out with friends, and back to home. And I always want something more than that, something that keeps me on the go and not slowing my pace. But again when things get fired up, reality hits hard and I ended up for not having time for myself.

To be frank, P24 is not a challenge for me YET. I mean yea, I need to find for sponsorship and money is very crucial at this moment. Pressure started to rise up but to me, this is still within my capability. The challenge is the art of balancing. Balancing with work and play is never easy. Most of the time I found myself torn between the both worlds. It’s hard to say no when your long lost friends call you out for a drink, or an invitation to former school gatherings. You know it’s not easy to find the time to meet up and gather at one place, and for me being touch with your old friends always leave me a nice tweaking feeling, just like when I went to shop with my boyfriends to get ready for prom. Seriously, I haven’t seen them for a year and next, we were having a great time shopping together. Well, nowadays people rely too much on technies and they lost the touch of intimacy.

But again, how about myself?? I feel crappy when I do not have adequate time for myself to either for reflection, pampering or just spaced out. Sometimes I got so exhausted and tired at the end of the day that I even try to keep my prayer short or worst, dozing off without completing prayer *guilty* Sunday is the only time for me to rejuvenate and enriches my spiritual life. That’s why I need time for myself to just settle my emotions and thoughts. A self reflection will be good one. Pampering myself will be gRrrreat one. I don’t mind being dumped in an island (not a deserted one of course) and supply me with never ending pina colada smoothie, shower me with good books and magazines, pampering me with spa, soak me in a hot tub! That’s what I call a sweet escape!!! And of course, having cute hunks will be a bonus. *devilish laugh* ok, back to reality. I guess going to Ipoh will come close enough…hahaha! Or just as simple as spacing out. No, I’m not joking. I need time to refresh myself, sharpen my senses, and renew my soul. Man, I’m really looking forward to my road trip to Ipoh just to be away from hustle bustle life. All I need is good food, hahaha… food for the soul!!

Oh yea, I lost my pendrives!! Not one, but TWO!!! Isshh… blame me for being so careless. Worst still, the whole collection of my USA pictures were all kept in the pendrive. But luckily, I have another backup. My sis was trying to scare me that others might superimpose my pictures and turned them to pornography!!! LOL.. I guess I have to put pendrives in my wish list for Christmas this year. *hinting* Early this week, I had this uneasy feeling for attaching my TWO pendrives together, but somehow I ignored it and see what happens?? Darn, I should have followed my instinct!

I have been relying too much on my own strength and wisdom that lead to de motivation, frustration and worries. I should have placed my trust in God and continuing to grow my faith in Him. I always believed that God won’t give us something that overburdens us. In fact He will grant us sufficient strength to carry out the task given.

“But those who hope in the Lord will renew their strength. They will soar on wings like eagles; They will run and not grow weary, They will walk and not be faint.” – Isaiah 40:31

Nevertheless, I’m glad that first, LAN is over!!! Woo yoo!!! Finally, the test is over. READ my lips, OVER!! Secondly, I have to admit that this bumpy week has somehow enhanced and stretch my capability to a higher level. For me, this is not so much of a learning process. I did learn little bits and pieces, but personally, it’s more of a grooming and polishes my talents and abilities.

I’m just glad that this week has officially over!

And yes, I’m back on track and feeling better now. Good is not enough.